25
Oct
08

Top 5: You’re Doing the Most

Every three seconds there’s a new story in music. Perhaps it’s a sign of the changing times, the day of instant news, or the fact that, via blogs, everybody on the block is a journalist. I have absolutely no issues with being informed the very minute something happens. I have noticed though, that some people are just doing the most. Here’s a list of the Top Five People Who are Doing the Most in Music Right Now:

5. Lil Wayne. Sigh. This guy. Where to start? Obvi he’s been busy outside of the studio, having babies and whatnot. Well, the re-release of the Carter III is upon us. No, it’s not a remix version, it isn’t remastered, there aren’t bonus tracks. The (new) Carter III will be all new songs…but it’ll be called The Carter III. I suppose that’s for old time’s sake.

4. Beyoncé. I’m not really a fan of Beyoncé. Anyone who sings with that much emotion and power and then walks around like a drone is not to be trusted. That’s just my opinion. Alter egos, dual personalities, secret marriages, how does she manage to keep it straight? Well apparently, Beyoncé has no problem juggling her (very fabulous…I can’t deny that she’s fabulous) life because she is embracing her dual personalities with a two-disc release, similar to Nelly’s Sweat Suit. One disc will be songs from her alter ego Sasha Fierce, who even has her own website.

3. Nelly. Dating Ashanti, forming a group with T.I., now he’s apparently forming a group with Akon, Pharrell and T-Pain. Now if that isn’t the most mismatched band of rascals. But, more on that later. Back to Nelly. Sean John Model, Apple Bottoms owner, Pimp Juice pusher and now member of perhaps the wildest bunch of musicians ever. What’s next, Nelly? What’s next?

P.S. Whatever happened to the St. Lunatics? What about that foolish ass clothing line, Vokal?

2. Pharrell. I love him. And it is just my luck that he is all over the place right now. From the Glow in the Dark Tour, N.E.R.D. did a little tour in Europe and then came back stateside for the Seeing the Invincible Sounds of Summer Tour. Basically, he’s been on tour for a year, but somehow, Pharrell manages to produce tracks for Common, design some chairs, supposedly knock someone up, form a group with Lupe Fiasco and Kanye West, put out a clothing line and still somehow join a group with Nelly, T-Pain and Akon.

Btdubs, I can’t support that random cast of characters. Nelly, T-Pain and Akon?!?! As if T-Pain’s vocoder-infused sound wasn’t annoying enough, you add Akon’s whiny, high-pitched voice, throw in Nelly’s rap/singing and Pharrell’s falsetto and it just…I shudder at the thought.

1. T-Pain. Being featured on everyone’s single, producing records, hosting award shows, (sadly) bringing the vocoder into style and being a member of two supergroups is not enough for your man T-Pain. He has to be the master of the Three Ring Circus I like to call hip hop. This combined with the fuschia sequined tuxedo and matching top hat, I’d say T-Pain is doing the most right now.

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